I Love this account, so romantic... but she's got me thinking this morning. She says she just follows something much greater than herself to create. Is this romance? What is the value of removing the power and responsibility from yourself? Does it feel powerful to see yourself as collaborating with a great force as a channel or tool? I see my creativity as coming from my own desire and through my own blood sweat and tears. I explore empowerment, responsibility, stewardship perhaps. I am part of the universe and connected to all, so there is nothing greater than loving and exploring my personal pinpoint of expression. And I'm very curious whenever I feel a rock (like her statement) in my shoe about how someone engages with creativity! I want to find every corner of my inner self and bring it to light. Wield it in my creativity. I think this pebble in my shoe tells me I want credit! I want to shine and be seen and respected. I want to use my skill and mind and heart to create the truest version of my art/self and show the world what I am. I find the way she described her creativity irksome... but I wonder if it would be relaxing to share credit? If it would feel supportive? I've often felt unseen in all of my efforts, in relationship and career. This is all connected. I'm going to use this opportunity to journal with my coffee so I can emotionally timestamp this understanding and keep exploring it.

I would love for everyone to attend, whether you specifically need technical help or not. I want us to bring what we have worked on since last we met. Show, share, get feedback from the club. Here's what I've been working on.

Years ago an artist friend and I gleefully declared ourselves “shapists” and I swear it’s a thing. I can feel my heart swell a bit when I consider shapes and how to explain their value to me. You can think of them simply as the silhouette or outline of something. I began to understand the power of accurately observing them in several layers over time. Perhaps the very first occasion was during a head drawing class. I was a beginner and very enthusiastic. Our supplies consisted of a large pad of smooth newsprint paper clipped to a drawing board, a charcoal pencil sharpened with a razor blade into a fine tapered point like a Chinese lettering brush, and a grey kneaded eraser. The class sat in a semicircle on wooden drawing horses around a raised model stage. Our model posed, lit with a single strong light source for three hours as we attempted to draw her likeness. During a break I walked around the room and observed what the other students had accomplished so far. One student had drawn the model's eyebrow as a shape constructed of many straight lines and not yet filled in with value, an outline. I on the other hand had used the side of my pencil to quickly swipe an arch above her eye. It was such an epiphany to see how much more accurate the likeness was with the their method than with my own. I realize now that I was doing what most beginners do, creating a symbol of what I understood an eyebrow to be, instead of observing what an eyebrow actually consisted of visually. This is when I began to appreciate the benefits of slowing down and observing objectively. It would take many more years of calibrating my observational skills and hand/eye dexterity to be able to get the degree of likeness I found satisfying. Years later while while out plein air painting I observed a tree. I realized that if I could slow down and hone in on each shape of sunlight peeking through the leaves and paint it faithfully.. without thinking “tree” or “light” or “leaves” that I would have a satisfyingly accurate and beautiful representation of what was in front of me. Prior to that I was estimating, abbreviating, rushing the shapes into sameness. The effect was cheap, plastic, and formulaic. That tree with many similar quick dabs of light wasn’t a tree… it was a clumsy cartoon of a tree… a symbol of a tree that was not purposefully designed. Now I will say that when knowledge is gained about the natural forms of the world through years of thoughtful observation and recording, one can create intentional symbols that are very beautiful. But you must learn the truth that is out there to be able to edit and craft your own visual language.

For those following along with my budding gallery relationship (which I am documenting for you)... I added more to the "lesson" Which selection of work do you like best?

The classroom is dense with information. Allow me to bring some of it out and highlight it for you. Here is how to utilize my lessons. The 4 Core Lessons Felicia has broken down the methods she used to evolve her own skill and shares them with you while offering presence and encouraging guidance. You will get access to one lesson per month. Practice each lesson until you perfect it. Get help from Felicia in Critique Club. 1. Step by Step Drawing - (Lesson 1) 2. Big Picture Quicksketch- (Lesson 2) 3. Step by Step Portrait Painting (Lesson 3) 4. Still Life Painting - Milk and Water (Lesson 4) These four lessons are the foundation of how Felicia taught herself to paint well. Repeat each of these lessons until you perfect* them. Follow along with, and master the steps until the process is second nature. - Lesson 1 - you want to perfect* likeness (shapes), value, and edge. - Lesson 2 - you want to perfect* your shapes, and color/value choices. - Lesson 3 - you want to perfect* likeness (shapes), value, color and edge. - Lesson 4 - finally, you will learn to strategize your approach within Felicia's step by step method for the added complexity of the still life lesson. You may vary your subject as you repeat these exercises. - Paint from life. - Paint self portraits or have someone pose for you. - Paint master copies. Let the variety in your subject keep you engaged as you commit to the strict process until you master it. After developing these processes Felicia utilized them unwaveringly for approximately 5 years -until they offered no more challenge. She then began to explore new processes or the abandonment of processes altogether . * Perfect doesn't mean that you make an exact copy of Felicia's demo unless that is your chosen goal. You must eventually decide for yourself how much realism you wish to portray with the mastery of these fundamentals. Precision can be found in any aesthetic. Perfect is when you are thoroughly satisfied with your efforts and don't need to be told by anyone else if it's enough. It may take time before you know where that line is. Until then... enjoy the study and the structure of Felicia's lessons and her guidance in Critique Club meetings.