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Why don't men want to talk about their prostate?
This question haunts me. In today's world, there is no reason not to know. I understand the older generation not wanting to talk about it. We came from a time when you did not talk about your business, your family, or anything really. Men were supposed to be an island, and women were the bedrock of the family. Men sixty and older did not talk about their prostates because anything below the belt might lead to an uncomfortable conversation. People might think you were less of a man to admit you had an issue "down there." It seems ridiculous now, but it was a fact of growing up in the 70s, 80s and 90s. Nobody really talked. If you were lucky enough to find someone to share your life with, then you could open up. Today everyone shares everything. Publicly, proudly. Nothing seems sacred. So why do men still not talk about the prostate? Why are there still stories about men diagnosed with a cancer they did not know they had and did not see coming? Here is the truth. I did not know I had a prostate issue either. Sixteen years ago a friend pointed it out to me at an airport. Without him, I might never have known to look. Early detection is the key to prostate cancer. Caught early, men survive and go on for decades. Do not be one of those men. Do not let yours be the family where the cancer spread because nobody knew. Get checked. Remove the doubt. So here is my question for you. Vote in the poll below, then put your reasons in the comments. That is where the real conversation starts. Why do you think the man in your life will not talk about his prostate?
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Why don't men want to talk about their prostate?
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How did you get the conversation started?
This community is about the prostate and how to raise awareness and knowledge about prostate issues. Half of the population has a prostate and the other half is related to them. But still nobody talks about it. Nobody is passing along the latest information that they heard about, that might just help their families, friends or neighbours. Why is that? I was fortunate that a friend at the airport, mentioned to me when they noticed a few drops on my pants. "he was very casual about it "Don't worry, it's related to your prostate, it happens to all of us as we get older" That was it, no drama, no shame, just a casual conversation. That was over 16 years ogo and it led me to start researching the prostate and learn what I could. Over time I realized nobody was talking about it and now, even though the prostate is everywhere online, nobody is talking about it. There are plenty of ads for supplements and for clinics that will offer you the latest surgery, but nobody just promoting conversation. True, there are support groups online that have emerged recently, so the signs are promising that the prostate will become mainstream. Right now I would put the prostate conversation where feminine products were in the 1970s, half of the population needed them, but nobody wanted to talk about it. That is where the prostate is now, yet again half of the population has one and nobody wants to talk about it. Currently I seem to start a prostate conversation almost everywhere that I go, so much so that my friends try to tamp down my enthusiasm when we meet, they have heard it all before. But I believe we need to talk about the prostate, to more often we do, the better off every man will be. So, I am genuinely interested how did you get the conversation started in your house? I know it is not a topic of casual conversation, and most men do not want to bring it up, but we do need to get past all that and bring the prostate out into the light. If you have a way that seems to work, please share it with us and we can all bennefit.
How did you get the conversation started?
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Welcome to Prostate Paladin — You Are in the Right Place 💙
Hey, welcome — really glad you are here. My name is Alex. Sixteen years ago a friend pulled me aside in an airport and told me I had a prostate problem I didn't even know about. I went home, opened a browser, and found almost nothing useful — some medical jargon, a few scary headlines, and no one talking to regular people in plain language about what any of it meant. So I started building the thing I couldn't find. Prostate Paladin exists because prostate health affects every man — and the people around him — and yet it is one of the least talked about topics in most families. The men won't bring it up. The families don't know how to start the conversation. And the internet is so full of noise it is hard to know what to pay attention to. That ends here. Here is what you will find in this community: Prostate Basics — clear, plain-language information about what the prostate is, what can go wrong, and what is normal at every age. The Conversation Corner — practical help for partners, children and families who want to start the conversation but aren't sure how. Symptoms, Tests & Diagnosis — what the tests mean, what the results tell you, and what questions to ask the doctor Treatment Options & Real Stories — what is available, what others have experienced, and how to move forward with confidence. Before you do anything else — grab your free copy of the Quick Family Guide to the Prostate. It covers the basics, includes the IPSS symptom test, and has a doctor checklist you can print and take to the next appointment. It is a good place to start. Follow this up with the other guides - to the DRE and the Signs Families Miss. The Guides are in the Classrtoom Tab at the top of this page - They are all Free One thing I want you to know: you are probably here because someone in your life has a prostate issue — and they are not talking about it. That is one of the most common situations in this community. You are not alone, and you are not overstepping by wanting to know more.
Welcome to Prostate Paladin — You Are in the Right Place 💙
It took two men in his own family before he booked the test
A man in Lancashire went for a PSA test last week. His grandfather died of prostate cancer. His father was diagnosed last year at stage four. He is a local MP, which is the only reason it made the news. Two men in his own family, and he still had not been, and the only reason this made the news is because he is a public figure. Think about that. How many men who are not public figures, have the same statistics in their own families? I am not having a go at him. He went, and he is now telling other men to go, which is a good deal more than most of us manage. What struck me is how ordinary it is. Family history is about as loud a signal as this thing gives you, and men still do not act on it until it is standing in their own front room. He also said that in his county, one in four men are not being tested at all. The other line I keep coming back to came from a local support group in the same piece. They have been running tests for ten years and have done over three thousand of them. Three thousand. One group of volunteers. That is what it looks like when a handful of people decide to get on with it rather than wait for the system to sort itself out. Which is roughly why this place exists. So a question for you all, and I would rather have honest answers than tidy ones. Do you actually know your own family history for this? Father, brother, uncles, grandfathers. And if you do not, is there someone still alive you could ask this week? I would venture to say there is..... https://www.skool.com/prostate-paladin-4886/about
It took two men in his own family before he booked the test
Twenty years of infections. One hour on the table.
The BBC has run a piece on Cheltenham General Hospital, which is now the NHS centre of excellence for a water jet procedure for an enlarged prostate in the south west of England. Fine. Good for them. But the bit that stopped me was not the machine. One of the men in it is 67, from north Cornwall. He had lived with an enlarged prostate for twenty years, and twenty years of water infections along with it. Twenty years. The operation took less than an hour and he was home the next day. Another is 57. He wore a catheter for close to a year first, and had already given up running and cycling. I read that and thought about how easily I let my own symptoms slide. I assumed I was just getting older. Slower stream, up in the night, a few drops where they should not be. It was never a decision to ignore it. I simply never framed it as a thing that could be dealt with. That is the trap. Not a lack of treatment. A lack of anybody saying out loud that this is fixable, and here are your options. I am not a doctor and I am not pushing any procedure. What I am pushing is the appointment. That is the key - when you have or see someone who needs help - get them to go to a doctor. Do not let them wait. So, honestly, and I would rather have awkward answers than tidy ones: how long did you carry your symptoms before you said them out loud to anyone? And what finally made you say them? https://www.skool.com/prostate-paladin-4886/about
Twenty years of infections. One hour on the table.
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Prostate awareness for men and women. The prostate does not belong in the shadows with no understanding. Awareness is the key.
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