If a team is building tools for internal use by other devs, those are the users and any failure of end users to accept what you created comes down to did you capture the problem the user actually has and cares about, did you gather the actual requirements from those users, and did you implement incrementally so that the effort stayed on track and had course correction input from the users early and often, and then just the quality and correctness of what you built. Where did this go wrong?

Who paid the cost of not reading it?

I will do the same thing of write it up and then give myself some time. And in that time, I try to convert my anger or annoyance into curiosity. I ask myself “why would a caring and capable human being have done X”. I also ask “what did I do to contribute to this problem”. Often if I’m honest with myself, I’m not blameless. And asking those questions helps me see the other person as another human just trying to make it through life as best they can too. So I get some empathy and it helps me let go of my anger and annoyance which are often just emotions enabling my negative state and keeping me there.

As a different perspective on fake it till you make it, I’ve thought this has been about feelings, not knowledge. It’s for when you have self doubt or imposter syndrome. Not about pretending you have more knowledge than you do but a way to get past the demons in your own head.

I honestly can’t think of any I haven’t been able to take value from. It’s like a Swiss Army knife of tools and the trick is not to pick one like a hammer to use in every case. So I mostly disagree with a dogmatic approach when using any leadership aphorisms.

Thank you @Aina Alive for sharing with us your challenges. I'll share one of my own which is around in-person meetings. We were doing an on-site meeting last week on Wed/Thu/Fri and I was quite anxious about it. While I've learned to love the social interactions and come across as fairly extroverted, that is learned behavior and takes a LOT of energy for me to do. Three days in all day meetings and then going out after for supper and drinks seemed incredibly daunting to me. Part of it is this feeling I have to be "on" all the time. Really thinking of what others are saying and contributing to the meeting and I was running one of the days and just always in my head. Which I likely should learn to do less but so far I'm not very capable. But what I have learned is that my anxiety ahead of time turns into actually really enjoying it too. It still takes all the energy I have and by the end of day Friday I was exhausted and had to spend the weekend alone to recuperate but even with all that, the chance for a deeper connection with my peers and to learn more about how they think and what they value, including things outside of work, is amazing and worth the effort. but not for more than 3 days!!