When we remove the stakes and the importance from social interactions, we can free flow. It gets way easier. Think what it’s like to talk to friends or family members. Easy right? You can almost tell them anything right? That’s because the stakes are low and you’ve removed the importance of how well the interaction goes. Get your head around that.

That can go for the opposite sex and random people you run into. The ones that seem to reject you or are not into you simply don’t understand yet. Sure, some won’t have romantic interest in you, but that doesn’t mean they dislike you. Those girls or guys that have been eyeing you have at least some interest in you. What a great opportunity to engage - make a friend or meet a partner.

Imagine going out and shaking hands, slapping high-fives, hugs, head nods, verbal, greetings all over the place everywhere you go… especially to perfect strangers. Just giving and acknowledging to tons of people no matter where you are. That is social warmth. Effortless warmth is a concept I’m meditating on these days. The idea is to strengthen your social warmth muscle so much that it’s very natural and effortless to be warm nearly all the time. I believe that to be genuinely warm, you need a dose of each of these: vulnerability, sincerity, curiosity, and generosity. All of these are very positive traits, and with them, everyone wins. Fear has no place here.

This is my experience from months and months of testing. Sometimes they can only handle a minute, sometimes they would be happy chatting for a while and sometimes only 30 seconds is enough. I’m finding, more and more, people crave interaction. The way and style that you approach always matters, of course. I have several stories of asking to sit with random strangers, where at first they were seemingly reluctant and uninterested. But…. Then after breaking through their guard, I couldn’t get them to shut up. It was cute. My point is, it’s very safe to approach and generally welcomed.