Giving monthly painting prompts. And it didn't catch on. As we spoke in CC this past weekend I thought that might be helpful when stuck. Is there something like this (or this) that you'd all like to participate in? Would you like to take turns giving them?

Two pieces I’m currently working on and one of the sketches behind the idea. I’ve done various iterations of this concept over the years, but never been satisfied. These feel Pretty ok right now, much stronger than past iterations. Thinking the blue one could be less blue and slide into deeper darks, and I may have overdone it with the moths. The linework feels important, but I’m not sure it’s working. Need to add more fragility to the green one and gray out some of the stronger color in her body. Also more variety/strengths in the linework - it’s lost in the overall piece. I will have more work done on these by critique club, and perhaps a third that is low key. But meanwhile wanted to share these, get a little feedback maybe on execution of concept and their emotional impact. Thanks!

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DdBo1IrNskp/?stkn=MWthcm9meTVmZTQyag==

Great meeting. It got me thinking… My injury in creativity and in being seen I see as a relational injury. Worthiness injury. I have overstepped boundaries in the past and in an effort to reduce harm, became very careful, vigilant and small. And it was also a teaching from formative relationships, an intelligent response to protecting myself in younger years. But it became so constricting. It became a vice so tight I stopped making, connecting. And having to abandon my voice, right to mistakes, or simply a different opinion, became a habit. So I am actively now searching for different ways to unwrap it, how to excavate intentions, and beliefs. That happens in this group, which I love. The thing I’ve done mostly to examine my limiting beliefs around care and responsibility, was shame work. That work would take me straight to what was supporting it. What I uncovered was—I am too much. To be a good person I need to be humble. I am responsible for others feelings. To bridge that belief to have more nuance and compassion I thought… I am inherently worthy. I can speak and take up space. I am learning and growing. I will do the repair when there is a rupture. I am not responsible for others feelings. It is ok if this takes me time while I am learning safety in being seen, with my strength and imperfections. I bring my own ingredients to the world. It is a gradual process, but is changing how I show up and make things and share things too.

I saw this and it resonated, about curiosity with perfectionism (from Sam Miller) When we explore perfectionism with curiosity, we often discover that it is less about excellence and more about the hope that there is a version of ourselves that will finally feel complete, accepted, or beyond criticism. Seen in this way, perfectionism becomes less something to fight and more something to understand. Rather than judging ourselves for being perfectionistic, we can become curious about what the pursuit of perfection represents in our own lives. For many people, what sits beneath perfectionism is not a desire for superiority. It is a desire for ease. A desire to feel comfortable being human. A desire to feel accepted without constantly having to prove something. From this perspective, the alternative to perfectionism is not lowering our standards. It is allowing space for imperfection, uncertainty, and authenticity.